When I worked with Dr Shan Visvalingham, rest his soul, he learnt a great deal about the health of children and he taught me a great deal. He said at one point that no baby born today has sufficient minerals in their system. So if we do nothing else, a good mineral supplement could assist so many children. Here is a small section of what Sandy Sanderson from Elektra Lifewrote in my new book ‘Creating Confident Kids’ on Magnesium for children.
“Children, being little people, have smaller bodies which react more quickly to stimuli. They are more sensitive to chemicals, dehydration or eating junk food laden with sugar and processed carbohydrates. They will therefore react more quickly compared to an adult exposed to the same stresses. When magnesium is low they will react even more acutely, sometimes with bizarre behaviours. One jellybean could set them off flying around the room with uncontrolled hyperactivity, followed by an energy slump and utter exhaustion.
Birthday parties with sugary cupcakes, fairy bread and soft drinks end up being a disaster for parents with children who are magnesium deficient because magnesium deficiency shows up as ‘sugar sensitivity’. Processed sugar and carbohydrates steal the little bit of magnesium their tiny bodies do store, leaving their cells unprotected with inadequate magnesium levels and prone to inflammatory responses and hyperactivity. It is too often the case that this ‘elevated state’ and inability to focus, sit still or concentrate is sometimes misdiagnosed as ADHD, when the symptoms are actually a sign of magnesium deficiency. As this deficiency is corrected by increasing magnesium availability, the symptoms subside and disappear”.
Sandy has written an extensive article in the chapter on Nutrition so look out for it in October.
I want to share with you a particularly great technique for Changing Behaviour, because you, or the child, gets to see themselves from different perspectives. The first thing you do is set out three chairs.
- Step 1. You simply sit the child or other person in chair 1 and write out what is exactly going on for them now. You may look at areas like recent behavior. There is no set time limit on this, so take your time allowing the child or other person to express themselves fully.
- Step 2. You ask the child, or other person to move to the second chair and talk about what they think their behavior did for you or whoever they disturbed, like a sibling, parent, teacher etc. In this chair the child gets to look at the situation from another perception. Again, take your time.
- Step 3. You ask the child, or other person to move to chair 3 and you ask them “How could I behave differently or who do I have to become, in order to get a different result next time I am in that situation? Be aware that chair 3 can become emotional, so let it. Sometimes, it is here that the child, or other person realizes they could have really affected the other person through their behavior or actions. Or they may realize it’s time to step up and change their behaviour. Just let the ideas come to them so they feel free to express them. At the end of the day we want children and others to learn how to be responsible for their world and therefore their behaviours so this exercise really assists that
This process is brilliant for negotiating with partners, children or work colleagues. I would do this with every coaching client, because it gets results and they love it. They get a chance to say it as it really is, from both their perception and from the other person’s perception. Then they work out how to solve the issue. Love this.