We are born so pure and innocent. We are born from a reunion of love. So why is it that for some reason so many people feel that we need to be told what we are not good at or that we require changing? I believe we just need to be loved and guided.
I read a story yesterday in the latest ‘Art of Healing’ online magazine. It was a story about an autistic boy who was diagnosed at the age of two years of age and put into a ‘special’ system for autistic kids. The mother could not bear to see her son shrug away from life and lose all of his enthusiasm so she took him out of the system and home schooled him. She allowed him to imagine, to look at the stars and create pictures that were very different. She prepared him for kindergarten and regular school. His special intelligence was soon realised and at the age of 11 he is was put into University with an IQ higher than Einstein solving scientific problems no-one up until now could have solved. A mother’s LOVE allowed this to happen. Love is a very powerful motivator for us to take action and feel worthy.
Not only is this about loving others, but loving who we are as adults, carers, teachers, trainers and parents because we influence so many people through the way we think and act. Whether we believe it or not the ‘Law of Attraction’ works. If we put out love, we attract more love back.
Joe Dispenza in his book on ‘Evolve your Brain’ (page 409) says “The brain chemistry of love is completely different from the chemistry we all produce in survival mode. The love potion released in the midbrain creates bonding. By falling in love with our ideal, we are chemically bonding with a new version of ourselves”.
When we are in love nothing seems as important as that love. Imagine building all the new synaptic connections (pathways) in the brain from a place of love. Children are the most happiest when they are young and playful and feel loved. So why does that change?
So if we want to emanate love out, it may be great to see children as perfect beings. It may also be great to communicate to children that they are always more than what they seem. When a child comes up to you and says something negative about themselves it may be great to say “So what else are you”? When they answer, ask again “You are even more than that aren’t you? So what else are you? You can continue this until they have physically changed their state and can walk away feeling great about themselves.
Children tend to feel ‘less than’ when they compare themselves with someone else. Rather than look at all the things they can do, they may focus their attention on the one or two things they are not so totally good at, which may leave them with a low self-image.
Our job as carers, parents, teachers and trainers, I feel, is to ask them great questions that may highlight what that child is great at. For example, “I bet you are great at reading, or playing or singing etc”. You see it is easy for a child that habitually goes to their negative feelings for themselves to continue to do that because it is wired in their neural network and it has an emotion stuck to it. By going there the child could think that they will get more attention. So retraining the child to see things differently and create a more positive loving picture of themselves is not deemed totally easy because there may be little reference for them to go back to. The frontal lobe has to create that new picture and the child will then attach a new emotion to it. By repeating that new positive picture with the child you can help them create a new image about themselves. A loving image. To do that we have to send love out during the process.
If the child begins to love the concept of their new self- image from your great questioning, to have them thinking differently, then they will eventually attach a loving emotion to those feelings and that will eventually be their new image.
Many children are taught to stop thinking about themselves. I think we should encourage children to think about themselves in a loving and positive way. It is not self-centred as that is thinking about you despite others around you. It’s in a way that is self-centred. When I first learnt this it was so far out of my comfort zone it was uncomfortable.
We were asked to stand in front of a mirror and say what was great about us. We were also asked to say what we would like to improve. That second list of what we could improve was very long. If you think about it people had always been telling us how we could improve. Imagine if the lists were reversed because we had allowed children to feel great about who they are. Encouraging this positive list could assist a child to see themselves in a whole new light.
Love is the answer. Loving you, loving what you do and loving everyone around you. It’s calming, empowering and allows everyone to be in control of their own lives and responsible for their own feelings, actions and beliefs.
The Universe wants you to love you. You were created as a pure loving being. Let’s get back to that reality. What a joy that would be.